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A Return... on a sad note

July 25th, 2006 (09:44 pm)
melancholy

current mood: melancholy

So I've been thinking about updating my journal for the last week or so (not that anyone reads it anymore), and I guess tonight I finally felt pushed to do it. Those of you who also read my wife's journal may think it's because we're moving, or because of work, or all the stupid crap that's been happening the last few weeks, but it's not any of that.

I feel crappy because one of my best friends, who I met my first day at Tulane has had a really shitty few months and I finally found out about it today. She sent me and some of our other friends a cryptic email about not having a computer for the next 2 - 3 months and said to call her on the cell phone if we needed her. I don't know why, but it struck me as odd, so I decided to call her. I also thought, "well I've been meaning to call her anyway since we'll be in Orlando in September and we can see her and her boyfriend."

So of course when she answers I say "when I got her email I just couldn't wait to talk to you", and I could tell when she responded that she wasn't 100%. I asked why she wasn't going to have a computer and she told me "it's leaving with Jeremy (her boyfriend)." I just didn't know what to say, they've been together at least 6 years and it floored me. You see she's from New Orleans and lived there her whole life until about 2 years ago when she decided to pick up stakes and move to Orlando with her boyfriend so he could take his dream job at EA Sports (Video Game Company). At the time I asked her about it and said, "Wow, big move, are you guys engaged?" and she told me they would be soon..... Obviously it never happened.

I just feel terrible she quit her job for him, moved away from her family and home so he could have his dream job and he leaves her. A few months ago EA had layoffs and he was an unlucky one... the only other thing I know is now he's decided to go back to Minnesota and that's it. She can't go back to New Orleans because there is nothing left there job-wise and nothing to return to except her family, and so now she is in Orlando alone. She's made some friends, but it's not the same, especially when you have a significant other, you don't have as many close friends or as deep relationships and so I'm really worried about her.

I know I don't post much, and when I do, it's about stupid crap, but I guess I just feel so terrible for her that I felt like I wanted to get it out and put it down somewhere. I talked to her for almost an hour and then Heather talked to her for another 30 minutes, I kind of hope it made her feel a little bit better, we could hear him packing in the background.... I don't know if I really hate him, but I'm just so pissed right now because she's such a wonderful person, and it's not fair for it to happen to her. Plus she's been left for the next 3 months with a lease on their house that she can't really afford on her own. I told Heather that I just want to get on a plane and go down there to give her a hug, and the fact that I can't makes me feel even worse.

She has always been one of best friends, since that day I met her moving in at Tulane. We've always been there for each other, and once when she was very sick I stayed with her and tried to take care of her until her parents came to get her.... I don't know, I just it's silly but the whole thing makes me emotional (I know guys aren't suppose to be emotional about these things, sue me). I figured if I got emotional on the phone with her though, it would have made her cry, so I didn't.... I just don't know what else to say really... I just feel crappy.

I told her we're taking her to Disney with us on Saturday and Sunday that week we're there, our treat using some of my bonus money, and that during that week after our Disney days we'd come hang out with her or go out dancing or to a bar... I'm not even a dancer, but if it makes Heather and her happy I will :)

She's just that kind of friend that no matter how many months or years go by, it doesn't matter.... it's all the same, you pick up where you left off, you take 10 minutes to catch up and you're back laughing and screwing around like old times, a life long friend, and honestly I don't have a whole lot of those, I can count them on my hands, and the fact that one of them is hurting that bad makes me feel just terrible... absolutely horrible, verge of crying horrible. It's just that much worse that I'm impotent in the situation and I can't go take care of her and make her feel better. So that's it... I feel like crap and I wish I could do something....

Comments

Posted by: Sherry (prettybirdm)
Posted at: July 26th, 2006 03:25 am (UTC)
Peatie

Wow you're post made me sad. I feel bad about what happened to your friend. I can put myself in her position..and the hurt she feels.. I wouldn't want to feel that ever..
Your feelings are very genuine and I commend you on that. You are human...you should show your emotions there is no shame in that especially if it's towards a good friend.
My good friend and I ran to the bathroom together locked the door...and she held me while I cried like a baby. That is a good friend..You are a good friend and I bet she really appreciates all you are doing for her. Help her heal and dance like you never danced before! :)

Posted by: X_Oracle (x_oracle)
Posted at: July 27th, 2006 11:17 pm (UTC)

I'm sorry... didn't mean to make you sad :(

I don't know how great of a friend I am, I just treat people how I want to be treated and she means a lot to me, she's a wonderful and sweet person who really deserves better.

I'm thinking about going down and helping her move though, figure it's a way I actually CAN help.

Posted by: jasminedragon (jasminedragon)
Posted at: July 26th, 2006 04:07 am (UTC)

I enjoy reading your writing as well. Very genuine feelings. I'm sorry for your friend. I hope things go better for her. Mind if I freind you?

Posted by: X_Oracle (x_oracle)
Posted at: July 27th, 2006 11:16 pm (UTC)

Sure Can, I already friended you... and thanks for the comment ;)

Posted by: ((Anonymous))
Posted at: February 14th, 2011 11:24 pm (UTC)

There is obviously a lot to know about this. I think you made some good points in Features also. Keep working ,great job!

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